I would like to discuss the average length of sexual intercourse as it relates to a woman’s pleasurable experience. I still remember the pain; I was often a premature ejaculator through my twenties and a portion of my thirties. As a young man, I learned that sex wasn’t just about PIV intercourse and that there are many other ways of providing my partner pleasure; ways of making sure she was sexually satisfied, even before actual intercourse. Yes, there was always a chance it could end early, what I needed to learn was control so our sexual enjoyment would last. I eventually discovered and learned to love cunnilingus, along with the necessary self-control so my own orgasms would not arrive early.
Researching the subject of premature ejaculation and even discussions with friends always yielded masturbation before sexual activity. I really dislike this technique. My question has always been about how to time it correctly. What about my own refractory period? What if I wasn’t ready to perform? Wouldn’t that be as bad and cumming too quickly? I have to say that I am not an orgasm-focused man. Yes, my orgasms feel great, fantastic, glorious; but the act of copulating in itself is as glorious for me. I also love the energy and pleasure I feel through my partner’s orgasms. My refractory period is very seldom under half or one hour and very seldom I am able go again before the one hour mark. What I’ve discovered is that in the rare times when I’m able to recover quickly, subsequent orgasms are not great, they are the “blah” kind for me; no orgasm feels as glorious as my first. This is one reason masturbating before sexual activity will never work for me.
So I learned to control my orgasms, control that allows me to “decide” when I will cum. Does it work every time? My Goodness no, but it works most of the time and it’s always great. I must mention that for the amount of time I’ve been practicing this technique, shooting my wad in less than ten minutes of intercourse doesn’t happen often, happens very seldom.
Let me say that even today, if I don’t control myself, I could ejaculate at soon as I penetrate a woman’s vagina — it has happened. Luckily, I have learned the necessary control to last as long as I need to, anywhere from 10 to 20 minutes, and in rare times 30, 45, or more extreme cases, one hour. You mean, PIV lasting an hour? Yes, it is possible. If you search Google with a criteria like “average length of sexual intercourse” you can find the average around five minutes. You will also find good information about techniques to help you learn self-control so you can last more than five or ten minutes in bed. As you may suspect, the glorious sexual pleasure, sexual bliss is not in the averages so, why would you limit yourself to five minutes of intercourse?
As I already said, the key for me was to learn to achieve sets of 10, 15, 20, or 30 minutes of fucking, and in extreme cases 45 to 60 minutes. After testing the available options, I settled for sets of 10 to 20 minutes because that it what works best for me, though any particular woman will present her own preferences. I have been involved with lovers who like me, love to have multi-hour sex — have sex for two or three hours, or longer in some cases. My perfect match will like to switch from intercourse to cunnilingus and back. I love repeating this multiple times during a sexual encounter — a few minutes of oral sex from which she usually cums once, twice, and sometimes women will have three orgasms. We then repeat the cycle until we run out of time or finish exhausted. Again, my preference is that my lover shares my love for cunnilingus. Of course, we may also stop our sexual activity to use the bathroom or refill our drinks or drink water because we’ve been sweating or otherwise losing moisture.
I personally don’t think about baseball. 🙂 Sorry, had to go there. What I do is simple. I learned that any shift in what I’m doing that is getting me closer to orgasm, will interrupt my orgasm. The shift can be minimal and usually, shifting to the opposite of what I’m currently doing works. If I’m going deep, shift to shallow thrusting. If I’m thrusting left, go right. Asking her to make a shift of one or both legs or completely shifting to a new position also works. You get the idea.
Hope this helps,
Jou
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